I may be unpacking 2020 pregnancy and labor for the rest of my life. I’ve written piece after piece to try and capture what it felt like to experience that in my body during such a strange time in history. None of them saw the light of day. A little raw, a little too true, a little too soon.
Willow seemed to enter the world looking for me. She was the only one of our children who cried after birth. The boys, wet, compact, chunky, gently laid curled on my belly, rooting their way to my chest. But she shouted for proximity.
She is witty, cuddly, and, oddly, cautious and fearless. Our daughter is a delight, and she fills my heart with happiness.
I don’t know where she picked this up, but she’ll come close, holding her stuffie, to wrap her little arms around us if she can reach, or lay her head on a leg if she can’t. She lets out a sweet sigh and says, “You my friend.”
There’s no tangible way to capture the warmth of her love on paper, but those sweet words are precious to me. Friendship is a meaningful force for good in our lives. When the right people are on your side, hardship is easier to bear; success is easier to celebrate, humility is easier to hold.
“You my friend.”
I know we’ve all felt the impact of this political and socioeconomic climate. We’ve lost friends. We’ve wished things could’ve gone differently, but we are here now, putting our lives and communities back together. We know that computers in our pockets and social media platforms are shaping our realities. We are adjusting, tweaking, and discovering what is life-giving again.
But one thing remains: Life is not as vivid, as alive, as delightful without friends.
I could offer tips for building friendships, but the truth is, I don’t have the remedy for our collective longing. But, just like I watched my daughter shout for me, I bear witness to us screaming for more proximity. To see and be seen. To know and be known. To love and be loved. To understand and be understood.
If I could, if it felt safe for you, I’d hug your neck, put my head close, give a big sigh, and say, “You my friend.”
May God bless you in the hidden longings of your life, in the tender places where you need it most. May friendship relieve your discomfort and anxiety. I pray love finds you and leaves nothing wanting or wasted.
Remember, you are a beautiful soul. Full of goodness and grace. Like Darth Vader said, “The force is strong with this one.”
Always rooting for you,
Ashley
After Hours in 2023: The first Thursday of the month, I send out a life changing conversation. It might be a family member, an Auntie who adopted me, a friend at 2am, a mentor from afar or up close who told me the truth I needed to hear, or a teacher who meant a lot to me. This writing to you will be full of the wisdom that’s shaped me, the stories that saved me, the hope I found in the love of family and friends. Loved sharing heartwarming words from daughter with you today!
Kids are the best and they definitely can teach us a thing or 2 if we let them! Thank you for letting yours teach you and sharing that lesson with us!